


Business Affairs

by Skyler10



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Co-workers, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Office Party, Pete's World Torchwood, Reverse Fake Relationship, Trope Subversion/Inversion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-01-15
Packaged: 2019-03-05 02:28:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13378194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyler10/pseuds/Skyler10
Summary: Rose and Tentoo's coworkers have noticed them together and are convinced they are cheating on each other... with each other.





	Business Affairs

**Author's Note:**

> For this “reverse fake relationship” story/prompt at DRP: https://doctorroseprompts.tumblr.com/post/169642324554/minssery-ask-bot-whats-the-most-ridiculous  
> Just a little cheeky fun I had while trying to break out of a tough spot in my WIP for this month’s theme. Not meant to be serious, but hopefully will make you smile.

The Doctor had forgotten a bit what it was like, being new to a place. Well, he was new to everywhere he landed, each day a fresh adventure. But he was learning again what it was like to be The New Boy. To be new in a place he would be staying for a long while.

For… forever.

Or at least, forever until their TARDIS grew. Then it was up to Rose, he supposed.

But new to Torchwood, he was. Of course, he knew Pete and Jake and made friends easily as he went, but it was odd being so far from Rose while in the same building. They would eventually work together on the same team, but she had loads of debriefing and paperwork to do now that they were back, so in the meantime, he was treated to the treasure trove of Pete’s special storage area. The stuff no one else had been able to categorize or figure out a use for. He literally rubbed his hands together in excitement to dive in when he started.

It never occurred to him to clarify who he was, _exactly_ , to the fellow scientists and engineers in Research and Development. The higher-ups knew, and everyone had a general idea that he had helped with the initial defeat of the Cybermen years ago, but down here in the basement, there was little room for hero worship. Just the way he liked it.

\-----

Rose had learned to be a fairly private person in her time in this universe.

It wasn’t easy having a fake identity, even if it was just a modified, parallel version of your own. Wealth and politics and prominence and oddity saw a mild public interest in the Vitex heiress, so she had to become more guarded about who she trusted.

Especially considering the love of her life was (mostly) an alien.

At Torchwood, this wouldn’t be all that eyebrow raising, but you never knew with some people. Prejudice and speciesism were always lurking behind the corner of humanity’s dark sides. At any rate, their story of parallel universes and his true age and origin were risks not worth exposing to the curious eyes of those who didn’t deserve the sensationalism of it.

So while her circle of friends and acquaintances knew about the Doctor and celebrated with her, the office as a whole only knew that she had a new man she was wild about. But not specifically who…

\-----

It took a full year before they realized the gap in information beyond their inner circle at the huge organization. By which time, they had exchanged vows and rings in a small private ceremony off world, even dragging the whole Tyler clan up to the stars! They were deliriously happy, and with the benefit of a time machine at their disposal, they took a long honeymoon no one ever really noticed because they could return without missing a day of work. Well, a few days of work, accidentally. It was still a baby TARDIS, after all.

In all the tragically-siloed-office congratulations, Rose in her high-level executive suite and the Doctor in his basement lab of scientists, no one put the puzzle quite together of who specifically they meant when they referred to “my husband” and “my wife”…

A few months after the wedding, a conference took them to New York, but work on the TARDIS and an explosion in the lab had delayed the Doctor from being able to fly with Rose. She was trying not to be torn up about it, but her plane seatmate, a kind lady from Torchwood: Wales she recognized, asked what was wrong.

“Oh, nothing, just my husband…” Rose trailed off as the in-flight meal came.

“Ah, my Rob and I had plenty of rows in the early days too, dear. Don’t worry,” the middle-aged woman assured. “Maybe some time away will be good for you both.”

Flustered, Rose tried to explain that it wasn’t like that, but the woman popped in her headphones to watch the featured film as they ate their prepackaged dinner.

The Doctor arrived the next day. Well, barely into the next day. It was 4 a.m. by the time he opened their hotel room door and announced his presence so as not to scare her.

“Oh, thank god.” She sleepily threw herself into his arms as he stepped inside and let the door shut behind him.

“Longest flight ever,” he grumbled. She nodded in agreement and allowed him to pull her into a deep kiss, full of gratitude to be in the same room, country, and continent once more.

\-----

Rose let him sleep in, of course, but brought up breakfast. She rushed back downstairs in time to catch the keynote speaker, but he still needed to shower. The pattern continued all day, just as it had for the past year: seeing each other in private or in brief passing, texting throughout the day, but never being in public in front of their coworkers at quite the same time. It’s not that they were hiding their marriage by any means… it just didn’t occur to them that no one else could see it.

Finally, at dinner, they were reunited. Her cocktail dress was a sleek black little number, not too formal or sexy for business but plenty short and complementary to her figure. His jaw literally dropped as she rose to wave him over to their numbered table.

“Now _that_ , Agent Tyler, is a _dress_.” He licked his lips as he checked her out.

“Yeah? Thought you’d like it.” She slipped her hand into his and fluttered her eyelashes.

Their flirting was interrupted by the speaker for the evening welcoming them all and explaining the menu, but they held hands under the table and giggled together enough to draw mild attention.

The (formerly) kind lady from the plane was also seated at their table and sent Rose a look she didn’t understand. Was it disapproval? Rose shushed the Doctor as he made a rude remark. He hardly noticed, distracted as he was by a scowl from one of his teammates across the room. _Jealous,_ the Doctor assumed. Well, Rose was taken, so his fellow scientist could knock it off. Ring to prove it and everything.

The night progressed on to the after-dinner dance and drinks. As the alcohol flowed, far away from the constraints of home and imbibed with the spirit of international cooperation, the all-business Torchwood agents limbered up. The Doctor’s arm securely around her shoulders, Rose raised her glass to Jake as he winked and pointed to his catch of the evening: a gorgeous, fit, American bloke. Lust was in the air, and the DJ pumped up the mood with a heavy bass and low lighting.

She dragged the Doctor to the dance floor as her latest favorite song came on. It was sultry, for sure, but she mainly loved pushing the Doctor to show off his moves. He really was an excellent dancer and always made her feel like the sexiest woman in the club. Or in this case, hotel ballroom.

“ _Shameless_!” she heard behind her back as they passed. She ignored the comment, assuming it was directed to the more raunchy couples on the dance floor. They simply enjoyed each other, finally able to relax after a stressful week and hectic day. The Doctor was plenty handsy tonight, however, so when she received more looks on their way to get drinks, she figured the other agents were just being prudish.

The Doctor left her sitting at a table while he procured drinks from the bar. It was a long line, but her hero was a chivalrous gentleman and knew her heels were killing her by now.

What Rose didn’t expect was two of the Doctor’s fellow researchers to approach her as she waited. They shifted about nervously, trying to find a way to confront her.

“Alright, spit it out.” Rose straightened in her seat after pleasantries were exchanged. No use in prolonging whatever it was.

“We just think it’s wrong,” one squeaked and dared to meet her eyes.

“You posh girls think you can get away with anything,” the other asserted, folding his arms in judgment. “The Doc is a good bloke. Isn’t right. He has a wife, you know. Just think about that when you break his heart!!!”

The scientists stormed away, leaving Rose flabbergasted. She was still blinking and gaping when the Doctor arrived back at their table with drinks. She didn’t have a chance to tell him about it, as he launched into excited explanation of their cocktails and how much she would love hers. She put the odd exchange out of her mind. By the time they left the crowded, loud ballroom, having danced to exhaustion and maximum randiness, they were thoroughly sloshed.

They didn’t even make it to their room before they were snogging like teenagers, jumping apart as the lift bell scared them into realizing they had reached their floor.

Unfortunately, a gathering of their colleagues was headed back down at the same time and caught the whole scene, including the Doctor’s hand up Rose’s skirt, most definitely grabbing her bum.

“Oops.” Rose blushed, knowing a lecture on professionalism would be coming as soon as these disgruntled agents sent word back to her father. In fact, they almost looked… scandalized?

“Sorry, folks, show’s over.” The Doctor grabbed Rose’s hand and they drunkenly giggled and crashed their way to their room, leaving a gaping gaggle of Torchwood employees to wag their tongues.

\---

They did breakfast in bed the next morning and skipped their first meeting in favor of nursing their hangovers. Their reception at the rest of their meetings that day was tangibly icy, however.

“Blimey,” Rose whispered to the Doctor, though it sounded like shouting, even to her own ears, “what did we do?”

“I’m so sorry, Rose,” the Doctor whined. “Glaskian tequila is so much stronger in this universe. If I would have known…”

“Shh, it’s alright.” She patted his hand, in part because his tone was giving her a headache and in part because their meeting was about to start.

\-----

He dashed back up to their room around lunch to grab them more paracetamol. They were feeling better, but still fighting off headaches, so the Doctor was a bit off his game and didn’t see the Welsh woman in the hallway storming up to him. He certainly didn’t expect her slap.  

“Bloody… what did I do this time?!” he cried.

She let her door slam behind her, causing him to rub his temple and squeeze his eyes shut. When he opened them again, she was scowling.

“I don’t know what kind of perverted prick messes around with the boss’s daughter while her marriage is in trouble, but know Pete Tyler will be hearing about this!”

“Marriage is?! What?!” The Doctor tried in vain to put the pieces together from what sounded to him like senseless rambling.

“You do know Rose Tyler is married, I take it?” The woman tried to compose herself.

“Yeeees…” The Doctor nodded once, waiting for her to go on.

“Well! Then.” She straightened her blazer and puffed out her chest. “Perhaps you should be more discreet about how you carry on then. It might appear that you are taking advantage, this being far from prying eyes and her obvious distress over her husband…”

“Distress!” The Doctor echoed. “We’re fine, I’ll have you know. In fact, she’s waiting for me right now, so if you don’t mind…”

He made to step around her when the light bulb went off at the same time for each of them. They turned to each other in realization. All the weird looks suddenly made sense.

“You’re…?” The Welsh agent bumbled. “You?”

“Oi! Our first anniversary is coming up, I’ll have you know. Wedding anniversary, that is. Plenty of other anniversaries too, I’m sure.” He tilted his head in fairness at how convoluted the timestream of their relationship was with not only time travel but separate universes to reconcile.

“I… I didn’t mean… that is to say, we all thought…”

“Far from prying eyes indeed,” he huffed. “Humans. I’ll have you and all your fellow busybodies know, Rose Tyler is my _wife_.”

“But on the aeroplane… I sat next to her, and she was upset.” The woman furrowed her brow again as she unraveled the story she and everyone else had made up in their heads.

“We were supposed to fly together, but I couldn’t make the flight.” He softened a bit at the knowledge that Rose had been noticeably sad about their predicament. “Was she really so upset you thought our marriage was in trouble?”

“Well, no, I admit it was just… I know what it’s like to… oh dear.” The woman sighed. “And all those who saw you two last night thought… because we knew you were both married…”

“But not to each other,” he finished mercifully for her, even as the Oncoming Storm flashed in his eyes. “I will not have her reputation sullied for this, you understand. You _will_ set every one of those meddlers straight. Got it?” He bit out the last words as she nodded in shame. 

He started to walk away but was stopped by her voice carrying down the hallway. “Doctor? I really am sorry.”

He waved over his shoulder and swiped the key card to get into the room.

\-----

Meanwhile, Rose was feeling better with lunch in her stomach but was wondering where the Doctor had wandered off to. Her mood took a downturn, however, as she spotted the scientists from last night. She vaguely remembered them confronting her… what was it about again? Her racy dancing with the Doctor? Perhaps they had gotten wind of the lift incident as well. A girl about her age was with them this time.

Body language told her this was no friendly chitchat. This was a cat fight. Rose adjusted her posture accordingly and remembered she was on display as Pete Tyler’s daughter (ok, 12 hours too late, but just in time for whatever this was).

“Hey, we’re from the Doctor’s team. And in case the message wasn’t clear enough last night, it’s time to back off.” The girl’s tone left no question of who she thought was in charge of this conversation.

“Back off from what exactly?” Rose narrowed her eyes at the small group that was gathering.

Hands on hips, the girl sent Rose a scathing look. “I’ve seen you two this weekend. And even back at the office. How you play with him. Listen, he may just be another lab rat nerd to you, but to us, he’s our teammate and friend, and we just don’t want to see him get hurt.”

The conversation from last night came back to Rose in a rush. Suddenly she was giggling. She couldn’t help it; soon it was out of control.

“We’re not kidding!” the squeaky one from last night insisted. “He’s a married man!”

“To me!” Rose wheezed and dabbed at her running makeup. “He’s married to _me_!”

“But! But…” the researchers who worked with the Doctor sputtered in turn. “You’re…” “You’re Rose Tyler! You’re…”

“She’s what?” In a shock to all of them, not the least Rose who was still rolling laughing, the Doctor appeared. “She’s out of my league? Well, got me there, folks. It’s true.”

“But it’s also true I married him anyway,” Rose teased, standing to wrap her arms around his side. His arm came around her in a possessiveness he rarely exhibited so publicly. She pecked a kiss to his set jaw and brushed a hand down his shirt.

“I would like it to be known,” the Doctor raised his voice to reach clear across the partitioned banquet hall, in which most of the lunch attendees had taken note of the developing confrontation, “that I am not only madly in love with this woman,” (Rose blushed as deep as her namesake) “but I am also lucky enough to be her husband.”

Those unsure of what was happening began clapping, just in case it was the oddest engagement and/or elopement announcement they had ever witnessed. Those who did understand the Doctor’s implications either gasped or hung their heads, however.

“So… when I saw you two kissing in the parking lot at headquarters a few weeks ago…” one of the researchers began, but shied away under the Doctor’s gaze.

“And I noticed you spent a lot of lunches together and did wonder…” a fellow Londoner piped up.

“Perhaps it should have been obvious to us all along,” the Welsh woman spoke up. The Doctor bristled, but she placed a hand up in a gesture of peace. “We could see how much you loved each other. We had just all lost faith that a love like that could be pure, for the one we had promised it to.”

The others either nodded or sat in reverence at the truth of her words.

“Well. I suppose there’s something to be said for communication, too,” Rose admitted.

As soon as she was back in the London office, Rose explained what had happened to her father. They realized how little Torchwood agents all knew about each other’s families and resolved to host more events that included plus-ones and getting to know their co-workers on a personal level. The next Christmas, Jackie and Rose worked together to make sure a lovely family photo was taken of all of the Tylers, including the Doctor, and sent around with season’s greetings to every Torchwood employee. Better yet, the Doctor and Rose had a visit to Torchwood: Wales planned, and plenty of not-so-veiled PDA was on the schedule.    


End file.
